#1 – Sweating
Yes you read that right. The heat in Thailand is a
beautifully relentless fact that has most tourists swarming into the Land of
Smiles most months of the year. For tourists though, they have the luxury of
air-conditioning, most places they visit, or inside the hotel room, but for us
expats living and working in Thailand, we get the poo end of the stick when it
comes to suffering in the heat. Thought your job was tough? Try teaching children
in stuffy classrooms with only a fan above your head, in 40 degree weather. You
manage to sweat in places you didn't think possible. But alas, the heat is
still a beautiful thing – along with the sweating – especially for those who want to lose weight, get fit and be healthy. The daily sweating surprisingly
keeps one’s skin glowing and smooth, prevents wrinkles and shrinks our
over-sized behinds to an acceptable jean size – not that one would dare to wear
jeans in Thailand!
#2 – Cockroaches and Rats
We love them! The creatures of the night are what make
Thailand. Without them you might as well be in the Mediterranean or the
Caribbean. Dates are made better when a rat runs past your feet, or a cockroach
brushes past your arm – heading to the hole he crawled out of. Yup, they
certainly make Thailand for more interesting stories.
#3 – The oh-so delicious smell of Sewerage
The smell of Thailand is like no other. If you were blind,
and walked around smelling certain parts of Thailand you’d think you were walking
in a sewer. Alas, this is another trait that makes Thailand, well, Thailand. No
complaints from me though. When I walk past a drain, and am greeted by a whiff
of sewerage, I immediately get hungry. Oh wait – perhaps that’s the affect of
living in Asia too long. Hmm... Perhaps it’s time to move.
#4 – Gecko’s
Every wall – every door – every floor! Gecko! Gecko! Gecko!
I find them to be one of the most strangely beautiful things about Thailand.
It’s a calming fact that Gecko’s are so comfortable around us giant creatures,
to be out in the open so. They make home everywhere and anywhere, and NOT
seeing them would definitely be something to behold. Their nature is very
serene, much like the Buddhist ways, and that is what adds to their strange
beauty. They are placid creatures in a placid yet bustled country. Two
enigmatic contradictions to have the pleasure of witnessing and experiencing.
#5 – Taxi Drivers in Thailand
Ok! Every single Taxi Driver here thinks he’s Michael Schumacher
or some Formula 1 racer. And the irony of it is that they’re probably better
than most racers. Strangely enough I feel safe when my Taxi Driver is driving
140 kilometers an hour on the Freeway or even up a tiny little soi (street)
that fits one and a half cars. They are certainly excellent drivers. One’s that love to learn English, find out
where you hail from and whether you’re on holiday or teaching English as most
of us here are. Sometimes you even find
a female Taxi Driver who wants to have a conversation with you while applying
makeup, learning English through her CD player and driving through the early
morning Bangkok traffic. Yes – that, my friends is when you start praying to
God she’s actually a man.
#6 – Khao San Road
I’m sure every person will know or will have heard of the famous Khao San Road, here in Bangkok. Once that place has you, it’s over
- unless you have the strongest will power known to man. “One
Night in Bangkok
and the World’s your Oyster” – well “One Bucket in Khao San and the street’s
your Neverland.” It’s one of those epic party streets where the backpackers and
one-nighter’s go before moving on to the next destination in Thailand. Unless
you know what you’re up against, you’ll get ripped off, groped inappropriately,
hawked at and countless other unattractive shenanigans that will make your
night more interesting. But again I have to say, it is strangely beautiful. The
road swallows you whole, gouges at your eyes, blinds you, and then spits you
out at 8am in the morning – leaving you wondering where the hell you were and
what the hell you did.
#7 – The Weird Blue Crabs
The tiny weird blue crabs that waddle along the shores of
Thailand are certainly intriguing. They build their homes just below the
surface, and scatter nervously at any sign of something or someone foreign to
them. Trying to catch the weird creatures is another story. I have come across
those who have managed to accomplish the impossible and have bared my pearly
whites in admiration for the time and effort they put into waiting for the
right moment. But most of us just admire the tiny sea beings from a distance
and make our way to our final destination – the awaiting sun chair and coconut
cocktail.
#8 – The Infamous Lady’s of Thailand
Yes, number 8 I talk about the strangely beautiful
ladyboy’s. With legs for days, a great derriere, fake boobs, and long silky
hair, they put most of us women to shame. Men fall face over feet when
approached by a beautiful Thai women in a short skirt. But more often than not,
what they don’t realize is that underneath all that womanly perfection is in
fact a man that likes to dress up as a woman.
What can we say? Who can resist a putting on a black little number,
stiletto heels and red lipstick – apparently not the Thai men? Alas, without
them, Thailand would not be famous. After all – they are the pinnacle for
Thailand’s sex industry. Just a fair warning to all you men thinking about
travelling to this exotic destination – be very sure. In this case – looks can
be extremely deceiving.
#9 – Soi Dogs (Street dogs)
There is definitely no shortage of soi dogs in Thailand.
Beautiful dogs, fat dogs, skinny dogs, and dogs that straight up look like they
belong in a Zombie movie. The downfall of this is that there aren’t many animal
shelter’s in Thailand, and Rabies is rife. But that doesn't stop me from giving
a sane looking dog some tender loving care from time to time.
#10 – The Amazing Toilet Sprayer
You may find this weird and hard to believe, but I find it
difficult using a toilet without using a sprayer since being in Thailand. It is
hands down one of the best creations I have come across in a long while. Going
back home for holiday leaves me missing my Thailand home for the simple fact I
cannot use my toilet (water sprayer) sprayer when I go to the loo. I almost
feel the need to go out onto the lawn and use a hose pipe, but that would just
be weird, and right now we've concluded my top 10 strangely beautiful things
about Thailand.
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